I raised two daughters. There is nothing sweeter than a daughter’s love for their father until they hit their teenage years.
For those of you who maintained good relationships with your sons or daughters throughout their teen years and into young adulthood, God bless you. You don’t know how lucky you are.
I had endless philosophical discussions with my daughters when they were young. We talked about their hopes and dreams. We went to fun events. We attended every circus and every Disney show. We went to their soccer and baseball games. We spent endless hours playing. I heard “daddy, I love you so much” more times than I can count.
With the first one, wherever I went, she went. If I went to a garage to discuss cars with friends, she was there.
Then they turn 13. Wow, it was like a divorce. Dad was suddenly the world’s biggest pain.
It’s the job of a father to do the right thing, to discipline when necessary, to set the example. It’s their job to begin the process of spreading their wings and to set boundaries between their growing sense of young adulthood and their meddlesome dad.
It wasn’t fun and it left scars. They remember the battles. You remember them on your shoulder at 3:00 a.m. when sick.
Question-how many times is it possible for your child to throw up in one night? Answer 1,433 (or at least it seemed that way). Then you go to work that morning because that’s what good fathers do to support their families.
They remember the discipline. You remember hours of continual heart-to-heart discussion when you were their best friend, their trusted advisor.
You need the memories of the good times just to keep yourself in check. They’re still the same little girls who needed your protection and friendship and there will come a time when they figure life out and the good times will return.
Record the good times. Sit and roll the micro-recorder or tape a play session or use the services of this site and do a recording. Let the memories of what was (and what will be again) flood both of you.
Both father and child need to become reconnected with the good times; the times when both were best pals. Sometimes the memories will act as a lifeline through troubled waters.
And maybe that is all you need to reconnect with the love that’s hidden for the moment while they come to grips with their own lives.
Happy Father’s Day.
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